Where have all the good men gone?
Trigger warning: Mentions of sexual assault
Hello! How are we? Since we last spoke just over a month ago I’ve been to Greece for a lush press trip, I turned 28 and… Oh! The singer Rex Orange County, AKA Alexander O'Connor, has been charged with six counts of sexual assault.
This month’s newsletter isn’t a fun and light one I’m afraid.
For those of you who don’t know, the chart-topping singer-songwriter appeared at Southwark Crown Court in London on Monday. He pleaded not guilty to the allegations of intentional touching of a sexual nature without consent, and his trial was scheduled for 3 January.
What makes the whole situation more awful than it already is, is the fact that O’Connor had just wrapped up what felt like a farewell tour. The singer said he had to cancel the rest of his gigs due to “personal issues” he had to deal with back home in the UK. There are clips of him performing while in a flood of tears, with most fans assuming the cancellation was due to his mental health. Little did they know that in only a matter of days he was going to be charged with sexual assault
Watching videos of his performance now makes me sick, it feels like a manipulative attempt to make everyone feel sorry for him one last time before the truth came to light.
And for those who are asking for proof of his abuse, it is incredibly difficult to get a sexual assault case to go to court. He’s been charged, it’s clear the evidence is there. Even if there isn’t evidence, in cases of sexual assault and sexual abuse you should always believe the victim. All of this “innocent until proven guilty” bullshit is incredibly damaging.
In the last couple of weeks, we’ve also had court documents state that Brad Pitt (allegedly) physically abused his children and Angelina Jolie while on a private plane, the news that Bill Murray (allegedly) kissed and straddled a young staff member on a movie set made headlines and earlier in the year news broke that Chris Noth (allegedly) sexually assaulted multiple women.
No one can sum my feelings up better than the Fairy Godmother at the 22-second mark (and I promise it will help lift the mood):
Look, while only one sentence in this clip is relevant to this newsletter, I couldn’t go past including one of the best action sequences of all time. The fact that it happens in the last 10 minutes of Shrek 2 makes it even better.
Moving on…
If you Google Brad Pitt’s name, articles about his alleged abuse are buried by stories that are much less important. Who cares about who he’s dating and his new skin line when he’s an (alleged) abuser? How convenient that the rumour he and Emily Ratajowski might be seeing each other has surfaced now… And this isn’t the first time a celebrity’s dating life has been used as a distraction.
At this rate, I’m not surprised by any news of famous men turning out to be complete and total arseholes. Actually, I take that back, if anything bad comes out about the likes of Hugh Jackman, Brian Cranston and Colin Firth, I will be well and truly shocked.
Look, I’m thankful that we’re now in a time where abuse like this is called out in the media and that some men are being held accountable. The #MeToo movement has helped ensure that famous men who were previously considered untouchable are facing repercussions. Unfortunately, if you’re someone like Brad Pitt, all it takes is a hot face, a slew of successful movies and the same PR team as Johnny Depp to have people ignore any negative claims made about you. Don’t even get me started on how the Depp and Amber Heard trial did irreparable damage to the movement (and just in case it wouldn’t be clear what my stance is, Depp is the scum of the earth and the Heard pile-one was disgusting and ill-researched).
Sadly, while this kind of abuse is being called out more and more in Hollywood, it doesn’t seem to be slowing down in the ‘real world’. In Australia where I’m from, 1 in 3 women (30.5%) has experienced physical violence since the age of 15. 1 in 5 women (18%) has experienced sexual violence since the age of 15. 1 in 3 women (31.1%) has experienced physical and/or sexual violence perpetrated by a man they know.
And here in the UK the CSEW – which provides a good reflection of the true prevalence of crime (including where it is not reported to the police) - estimates that in the year ending March 2020, 618,000 women experienced sexual assault (including attempts), and 892,000 women experienced stalking.
When we are faced with awful and confronting figures like this, at least we can find solace in the fact that we are finally seeing some men face the repercussions of their actions. This month we are seeing the high-profile trials of three celebrities accused of sex offences begin.
Producer Harvey Weinstein, Danny Masterson (That ‘70s Show) and Kevin Spacey (House of Cards) are all facing court dates for cases relating to sexual assault claims. Weinstein is a convicted sex offender who accumulated over 80 accusations of sexual assault and harassment that kickstarted the #MeToo Movement.
The movie mogul is already serving more than 20 years in prison for a rape conviction in New York. He is faced with life in prison in California if convicted in Los Angeles of the sexual assault of five women in separate incidents from 2004 to 2013.
Jury selection began earlier this week for Weinstein's trial as well as the trial of Masterson, who has three charges of forcible rape against him and a possible sentence of 45 years to life.
As for Spacey, he faces a civil court case this month relating to claims of sexual abuse brought against him in 2017. He is being sued for $40 million USD in damages by Anthony Rapp, who has claimed Spacey sexually assaulted him when he was a teenager.
Hopefully, survivors will receive some kind of justice.
On a lighter note, I’m going to leave you with this:
Look, David Cameron couldn’t successfully lead a country if his life depended on it but he does have great opinions on movies… and the fact that he and I have a similar movie opinion is going to keep me up at night.
Ciao for now.